How Hard

Behind my bubbly look are difficulties, hardships and struggles that I am trying to conceal. A lot of people say, it is us who made choices in our own life. That it is up to us if we wanna live it joyfully or in any other way. But I tell you, if you’re in my shoes, you’ll really say that it’s not only you (us) who’ll make your life, because if it’s only me who’ll gonna make choices, then I’ll always choose the best option.

How can I be really happy if whenever I got home, all I can hear is my father’s struggle with his infirmity? That I am so helpless and couldn’t even alleviate his pain. I’d even rather stroll outside than seeing my family crying because of helplessness. Yes, believe it or not, I may not look or sound one, but I belong to those Filipinos living below. I’ve been so very grateful still for I got friends (Yvette, marky and augrae especially) who’re there, letting me use their PC for this blog, lending me some penny if needed and best, listening to me if I need some ears. The question is, if all of these are just trials, when will it end? I even think that it is no longer a trial but a picture of how’s life is unjust. I really hope that I could stand with all of these and not fall in despair. I got a new bestfriend, who really listen to me and makes me feel lighter, this BLOG.

What About My Easter?

Though it is too late to do some postings about my Easter experience, I feel like it deserves a space in my blog. I had one of the happiest Easter Sunday I ever had. We spent the day in a nice white sand beach. It was very memorable for I spent no penny in that outing. My classmate do the treat. At first I really thought that I'll have a very lousy Sunday. But it turned out to be joyous. In the pic above is me and my friend/classmate Mary Joy.

Susan Boyle: She Made Me Cry

I'll be honest, I really hate crying. And if I did, I hide. I don't wanna let others see me falling down and so pathetic. This is me.

One day as I surf the net for news, a line caught my attention. The line says that someone shocked Simon Cowell. Who doesn't know Simon? American Idol? Britain's Got Talent? So I wasn't satisfied with just that line, so I really opened the link and read the whole article. And I saw an old woman, in front of the three judges, auditioning in Britain's Got Talent. Yes at first look, you'll really say that she got nothing to show. Human nature! As I watch the video clip, I was silent. I was stunned. She was so unbelievable. I became quiet. I cried. Really cried. She's so amazing. She's Susan Boyle, 47, unemployed and from a village in UK. In the video, everybody, including the judges and the hosts were shocked and almost cried. They gave her a standing ovation that she really deserve. I can see an innocence in her Susan's eyes, and her voice is so angelic that nobody will dare to criticize. I wish her the best of luck and her win she deserve. She's a living testimony that we shouldn't judge a person by appearance. But the ability and the kind of person he/she is. She'll be a mark in my mind and in my heart that no matter what people say, we should believe in our self and own ability.

watch the video here http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9lp0IWv8QZY

A Taste of the West

I've been reading blogs and forums regarding home decorations and setting up. Most of the in-demand theme or motif is the western look. If you want to make your home looks like one of the homes in the west, then one of the best way is to set up western furniture. What's nice in this furniture is that it does not just resemble western living, it also speaks of quality and durability. How I wish that the house that I have will have a look that I'm dreaming of since before. You? Have you also dreamed of having a home in which you'll have a taste of the west? It's never too late.

My Journey to the Top

Last holy week, my friends and I had our own way of remorsing. I dunno if they considered it as a penitence, but for me it was. Wednesday evening, we started mounting the highest peak here in Iligan City, Philippines which is Mt. Agad-agad. It is more or less 1,900ft. above sea level and for me it is really not that easy to summit for the terrain is so demanding that you really have to be focused or else you'll end up rolling down. We started our journey at exactly 6:47 in the evening. We're very lucky that time for the moon was in its full phase so it wasn't really that dark. It was a long walk. And it was not that easy walk like your climbing a ladder or strolling in the park. It was a hard one that you really even have to use your hands in climbing up. Yes, it was dangerous. We've got no ropes or something. All we have is the excitement and the determination to summit. We spent more than 2 hours in climbing up. But it was so rewarding. We've got the nice view of the city. I'm sure it'll never be the last time. We're planning to have a season 2 of our climb.

I Can Hear His Pain

Do you know how it feels to hear your dad, your mom or any family member crying in pain?

It's so depressing that I couldn't do anything just to alleviate the pain that my dad is feeling. I reallt thought that the ache that his illness caused is over. That he's feeling better now and that we have nothing to be worried about. But one day, I entered his room and I saw him how he is suffering from very severe pain. Yes, he has cancer, a colon-rectum cancer. The most depressing part is that I'm s o helpless. I wish I haven't seen that scene so that I'll never pity. But I saw it and it is so devastating in my part. From that moment I realized that my dad, even in the middle of his agony, still thinks for us. That he feels like hiding the pain just to spare us from worries and that he had to wear a mask just to conceal how he really suffered from deadly pain. My feeling is indescribable. I really wish that if I can take the pain from my dad and suffer it by myself, I would. But checkin the reality, I couldn't face it. A help!

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